Mixed feelings

I spent much of the weekend trying to deliberate whether I should have surgery or not. I guess I'm bothered thinking that my partially torn ACL might give way completely in the future. I know that's looking far towards the future but still. I'm very concerned.

Some people are suggesting to go ahead with the surgery since my insurance will cover it. If it pops completely in the future I might not have insurance anymore. Very good point. It is indeedsomething to consider.

Barbs and my mom were telling me not to have surgery since it won't guarantee that it won't tear again in the future. An ACL will always have the possibility of getting ruptured regardless of whether it's completely normal, partially torn or reconstructed. The doctor doesn't recommend reconstruction anyway so why do it. Should it rupture completely then that's the time to go have it fixed. I fully understand their thoughts. I think it makes the most sense for now.

Doc says a partial tear is alright as long as I don't lose any mobility and I don't feel any instability. I honestly don't feel any of those symptoms now as I've never even felt my knee buckle or give way especially when walking on inclines and going up and down staircases.

But I'm still confused though. I'll just see how it goes after rehab. Then I'll take it from there.

I should be back playing by September, in time for the IBM sportsfest. No way in the world I'll miss that.

I'll be ready by then.

Partially torn ACL

Got my MRI results this morning. I immediately took out the report as I headed over to Dr. Bengzon's clinic.

It read:

Acute partial tear of the anterior cruciate ligament.
Bone contusions, lateral femoral condyle and posterior aspect of the tibial plateau.
Minimal joint effusion versus hemarthrosis.

It was a relief knowing that my ACL wasn't completely torn. Though I'm not sure whether it was good news or bad. It wasn't the best-case scenario but it surely wasn't worst-case either. I'd take it nonetheless.

Doc said I'm lucky to have strong thighs and legs. He was astonished on how I was able to survive my valgus-abduction clip injury (a direct blow to the side of the knee) with only a partial tear. Normally the MCL and meniscus give way too. He recommends that I should undergo a 4-week rehab program to strengthen my quads and hamstrings further.

I immediately had several thoughts and concerns about the results though. I grouped them into the "pros and cons".

Pros:
- I don't have to undergo reconstruction surgery
- No need for rehab/therapy for at least six months post-op
- My muscles won't atrophy
- I can go back to playing after about a month of therapy
- I don't have to miss work
- No crutches for me
- No incisions due to surgery
- Surgery and rehab is expensive (though my insurance will pay for most of it). I still won't have none of that.

Cons:
- Since there is a partial tear, I'm afraid that there's a high probability of completely tearing it in the future
- Knowing that I have a partially torn ACL might get into my head. It's just as difficult mentally as it is physically
- Should I stop playing strenuous and physically-demanding sports to prevent further damage?

I think the pros outweigh the cons so far. I'm grabbing myself a new pair of Jordans, and will have myself ready to play ball soon.

Watch out.

Gym

I finally hit the gym last night after about 2 months of inactivity. Haven't been off the weight room this long, so I badly needed a workout. It was actually very productive. I was stressed so I needed an outlet pretty bad.

Funny though cause I saw some IBM colleagues that never in my wildest dreams would I think they work out.

I need to get back into shape, not that I ever was out of it. But you get the drift. Going back tonight for second servings.

Rude awakening

Does anyone here agree with me that copying and sending a supposedly personal IM conversation to a third party is downright rude and improper?

I hear a chorus of "Ayes".

On MRI; Second opinion

Had my MRI done yesterday afternoon. Man, that was like the longest 45 minutes of my life. The machine was noisy, my headphones weren't enough to muffle the sound. The music aided though, but the songs weren't exactly my choice. Anyhow, glad it's over and done with. The results will be ready by tonight. Still thinking whether to get them later or over the weekend.

I went to another orthopedic surgeon, Dr. Michael Bengzon, to get a second opinion. He's an Atenean, and I've friends who were his patients already. I felt more comfortable with him than the first doctor. Dr. Quintos was kinda aloof and nonchalant, while Dr. Bengzon was more hands-on. He actually took time to explain and answer my multitude of questions.

Going back to his thoughts, he said that my right knee was bit looser compared to my left one but that it wasn't obvious at all. He said he's looking at a partial ACL tear, or best case, just a badly bruised knee. He also said that he would recommend having the MRI done too, just like Quintos.

I'll reserve judgment until I get the MRI results.

Crossing my fingers.

Mother Knows Best

One of the biggest misconceptions in life.

Mother knows best.

No, not all the time.

Believe me.

Torture

I'll be having my MRI later this afternoon. I think the results will just confirm the doctor's diagnosis. I'm hoping otherwise though. I don't want to go under the knife. And I'm still in a bit of denial that I've torn my anterior cruciate ligament.

It doesn't help that for the past couple of days, I've been reading ACL Reconstruction articles and diaries over the net. I swear this is torture. I can just imagine myself having the surgery. It gives me the chills.

Ugh.

Blek Hawk Down

We had some sort of a grand reunion yesterday at my friend's wedding. Friends from high school and college were there to show support to our dear hekhek master. Most of us actually agree that we felt Von was the last person who will get married amongst everyone. And now he got himself locked down. For good.

On a personal note, it was a totally new experience for me, as I've never been invited to attend one. I was a bit nervous as I had to play a role in the wedding. Blek asked me to be part of his entourage as a groomsman. Of course, I had no idea on what role a groomsman plays. No one briefed me (or us) about anything. I just found out as the mass started that I was to light the candle along with Von's sister. Talk about short notice. Anyhow, it was fun. Had a really good time.

Shoe stories

I went to Rockwell last night hoping to cop a pair of black leather shoes I saw a couple of weeks back. In true Zara fashion, it wasn't available anymore. When you see something you want in Zara, buy it right away. Chances are, it won't be there when you come back for it.

Punyeta.


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I almost bought basketball shoes this morning. I've been wanting to get these pair of Jordans since I first saw them online several months back. Weird though cause this colorway is only available in select SM and Olympic Village outlets and not in the major Nike retail stores. Anyway, they were at 20% off, which makes it a pretty good deal already.

But I remembered I had a knee problem. I was going back to the doctor this Monday to have my knee evaluated. Worst case would mean a torn ACL, reconstructive surgery and 6 months recovery time. Best case is I can play in a few weeks time.

Should the checkup go well this Monday, I'll go 'head and get 'em shoes. Otherwise, I'll hold back.

I'm praying for the former.

Goin' Stag

My friend's getting hitched tomorrow so he had his stag party last night at some hotel in QC. Unfortunately, I missed the show. Got tangled with my own plans and was just too exhausted after so I fell asleep.

Heard it was hella crazy.

Yeah, I bet it was. Si blek pa.

Maong para sa Tulong

We don't have casual fridays here at IBM unlike most companies. We can, however, wear casual on Fridays if we donate 50 pesos to the Gawad Kalinga fund. This has been going on since April. It was only supposed to last for the rest of summer. But due to it's popularity and success, they've decided to continue to project.
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I wore jeans today. It's actually the first time I ever wore casual to the office. Wala lang. It's a milestone.

My colleagues here at workforce management were commenting yesterday that they've never seen me in jeans and that they want to see me in jeans. So there. I obliged to their request.

Cancelled plans

I don't think I'm OC, but sometimes I have to admit I'm a control freak. That's the reason why I keep track of my schedule. My time is platinum, more valuable than gold.

Oh yeah, did I mention that I especially hate late or last minute cancellations?

ACL tear(?)

I went to see an ortho-surgeon yesterday over at Medical City to have my knee checked. Initial diagnosis is that liquid or water is building up. It resulted in my knee flaring up but not to the extent that it needs to be aspirated. Doc says it should go away within the next week. Aside from the water build-up, he said that my right knee was loose as compared to my left one. There is a possiblity of an ACL tear, but that has yet to be confirmed. That's just looking at a worst case scenario. Best case is that my knee is just badly 'bugbog'. I'm supposed to go back after a week when the swelling goes down for an accurate diagnosis.

Damn. My heart sank upon hearing that. I guess hearing those three letters comprises an athlete's worst nightmare.

Regardless of what happens during my next checkup, friends are telling me to get a second opinion. Possibly even a third. Then reach a consensus afterwards.

Til then, I'm keeping my hopes up.

100

This is my one-hundredth post. It's a milestone so I'll dedicate one post just for this.

Moving on...

Knee Scare

I busted my knee yesterday afternoon playing ball over at Moro. Wasn't even an hour into the games when someone cut me and hit my right knee just as I was about to takeoff for a fastbreak layup. I never had a chance to jump. I felt my knee give way and buckle down as soon as it was hit. The collision made me fall right to the floor with no ability to cushion my landing.

It was hella painful. Couldn't walk for about 30 minutes or so. Had to be carried off the court. Initial signs seem to be positive. I was playing with people who have had torn ACL's before, and they said it didn't look like an ACL injury. Still had enough mobility to move my knee around. Just the same I need to have it checked asap. Too bad though it was a weekend, thus no orthopaedic specialists available. My girlfriend kept pressing me to go to the ER, but I said that wasn't needed. No offense to the ER personnel, but I bet they don't know jack about sports injuries that are not bone-related. It was just going to be a waste of time and effort.

I'll be going to see a specialist tomorrow. I'd like to go see Dr. Jose Canlas, as he's the resident sports medicine specialist of Ateneo, as well as the national team. I think he's regarded as the best in Asia too. But I don't think he's part of my healthcard's network so that means I have to pay. Knowing that worst case scenario will be a potential ACL tear, that's gonna be damn costly. I'd have to pass on him then. I'm sure there are good and capable specialists that are part of Intellicare's network of doctors so I'll go check them out.

I'm actually scared to have my knee checked as I don't know what they'll tell me. Nevertheless, I've been hurt and injured so many times already that it's really no big deal anymore. I'm sure I'll bounce back regardless. Injuries never get to my head anyway. They have no psychological hold on me. Hmm. Come to think of it, it only shows that I'm either fearless or stupid. I'll take the former. I just don't back down, especially not with my daredevil ways.

I play for contact. Bring it on.

United 93; Looking back at 9/11

Barbie and I watched the documentary-like film, "United 93" last night at Power Plant. It holds a bit of sentimental value as my dear mom was airborne on September 11, 2001. She was flying Cathay to Manila via New York and Vancouver. She was on her way back home when the US officials ordered all aircrafts in US airspace to head back and land in the nearest airports. For all we know, it could've been her flight that was hijacked and used as a weapon of mass destruction.

After seeing the movie, I hold the following sentiments:

1. I salute all the passengers of United 93. I admire the courage and bravery that these people demonstrated. I was hoping to see the passenger manifest after the movie, in case the producers want to give some sort of tribute. Alas, there was none.

2. The US military, despite being the most powerful armed forces in the universe, have officials that don't have balls. Freaking cowards. Fuck the rules of engagement when we're talking terrorism and war.

3. I want to go and beat up the next Arab man I see. No racism here, just plain and simple angst. If you guys watch the movie, you'll understand.

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Damn. It's been like a day already and I still have that urge and angst. I need to find myself an Arabian punching bag.

Anyone with me here?

Let's roll.

Nastiest Dunk ever.

I've seen a lot of nasty dunks over the years:

MJ's free-throw line dunk...

Dee Brown's 'no-look'...

Vince Carter's elbow slam...

Jason Richardson's between-the-legs...

Andre Iguodala's off-the-back-of-the-backboard...

...but nothing even comes close to this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRdpjxIlhvM&mode=related&search=

It's a 720. Done by Air Up There from the And1 MixTape Tour 2006.

Elbow Room

Played basketball with the IBM folks last night in Ateneo. Had an ugly start as I almost came into blows with an officemate. This guy had the freaking guts to come up to me and ask for a fistfight. He was holding and pushing me as he was setting screens. Naturally, I'd fight off the screens and shove him back. Not my fault if he got thrown off with my effort.

Everyone will acknowledge that I will tear him apart should I want to.

Anyway, I met another accident later duing the night. It was a fastbreak opportunity so I drove down the lane with the usual reckless abandon. Juvy decided to challenge my shot so we had a huge collision mid-air. I'm used to falling to the ground since my goalkeeping days so I knew how to fall. Too bad though as a metal cage usued to store basketballs for PE was directly under the goal. I slammed my elbow right into it. Tangina mo, Juvs. Hehehe.

I couldn't move my right arm for about the next thirty minutes or so. Damn, it was painful.

Barbie accompanied me to Medical City afterwards to have my elbow checked. X-rays were negative so it was a big relief.

I don't want to have another major injury. I think I have more than enough to last me a few lifetimes.

Thanks B. What would I do without you?

Love at the Workplace

"You can meet interesting people, attractive women at all sorts of venues - parties, bookstores, concerts. But most people I've asked tell me almost all their long-term relationships were with people who worked in the same office (though in a different department) as they did, or whom they met through work-related events. They clicked with them because they already had so much in common."

- Men's Health Philippines, February 2006

I just came across this today. Nice. Seems like a situation I'd love to be in right now.

Whirlwind Month

It's been a month since a series of events occurred. I've never been this delighted before. Life's never been this great either.

I love the feeling.

World Cup fever

A lot of people, non-soccerheads especially, have been riding the World Cup bandwagon. These people aren't even knowledgeable about the beautiful game that's why it upsets me that everyone's so going gaga over something they wouldn't care about had it not been a World Cup year.

I'm certain that after the final match has been played, these people will forget abour football. They will never watch another game. Yet four years from now, I'm hella sure the same people will be die-hard fans once again albeit for only several weeks.

Frontin' at its finest.

Oh yeah, I played competitive football for half my life. So no, I ain't riding the bandwagon.